Well….Trash is le tired and I don’t have the time to go in depth about the episode but what I want to know is…
HOW THE F*CK IS DARIENNE LAKE STILL ON THIS SHOW?!
Listen she has walked on that stage every damn week in her finest Lane Bryant, Cato, and Ross Dress for Less fashions. TRANSLATION, SHE LOOKED BASIC AS HECK week after WEEK! To top it off she had the NERVE to walk out there in her final runway look, lookin like a sparkly turd. Ma’am, Latrice would NEVER! And she keeps clomping down the runway in orthopedic looking heels. #BYE
BenDeLaCreme is polished and the only one that could keep up with Queen Bianca Del Rio. Unfortunately, the final lip sync left much to be desired from both. I hope Kelly Clarkson never catches wind of this lip sync cause…. ::yawn::
SO the top 3….IN ORDER will HAVE to be:
1) Queen Bianca (if she doesn’t win, i’m not watching the show again.)
2) Courtney Act (She may not be the best but at least she’s pretty and consistant)
3) Adore damn Delano (This should have been Trinity, Joslyn, or DELA’s spot)
RuPaul…I never disagree with you but…you f*cked this one all the way up. If Darienne doesn’t roll on home next week, I don’t know what I will do…
The ladies are back in the workroom and Adore discusses how disappointed she is in her performance in the talk show challenge. Courtney is bringing a bit of shade to the proceedings but it’s clear that she and Bianca are friendly. Competitive but friendly.
The next day, Darienne makes a quip about leaving banana peels to slip up the competitors. The Not-Shemail is all about weddings. Ru enters and the mini-challenge is a “body art painting challenge” with a theme of marriage equality. This is really just an excuse for RuPaul to pun it up. I approve.
The art doesn’t matter and Bianca wins! “Ooh, very Andy Whore-hol!” As you know, Bianca can do no wrong for me. So yay!
After a shower, Ru announces that we have company coming. Ru announces that she’s an ordained minister and will be marrying 6 couples on the runway. Bianca pairs up the queens with the ladies. Ru is looking for a strong family resemblance and the queens will serve as the mother of the brides. The grooms enter and Ru announces that the queens are dragging up their husbands-to-be! This twist showed up on a season of Project Runway and it’s still good.
Adore is nervous as she should be. Lest we forget that Honey Boo Boo mess she put together in Episode 1.
When we return from the commercial, Bianca bonds well with her couple. Joslyn loves weddings. Brandon is acting like he didn’t know he was signing up for RuPaul’s Drag Race. Good Night Nurse. It is Season 6. RuPaul walked you into the room. WHAT DID YOU EXPECT?
Dela gets a zinger in with Courtney. “Courtney might have trouble transforming a manly man, since she only uses Chapstick and mascara!”
Ru comes in to grab the biological ladies. Bianca and her groom bond a bit. Bianca: “Look, I actually made a friend. Me!” Love her.
Joslyn and Ru doing her foxy honk which is completely adorable.
She says that she’s going demure. Brandon still hasn’t figured out what he’s doing here. Whatever. Darienne appears to be doing a much better job with the design this time but Ru is skeptical of their goth wedding. Bianca’s gown is pretty much done and it is flawless. She banters with Ru because she is seriously the best. We don’t see any of Ben, Courtney, or Adore. We’ll see how that plays out.
After Ru’s exit, Bianca offers a bit of advice to Adore as she works on her hideous gown. Again, it’s Season 6, boo. No sympathy from this corner.
We reenter the Werq room and Adore’s bride reads the shit on her wig. Courtney comes for her and her bride in a way that’s hilarious but a little mean. Oh well! A reference to Honey Mahogany! Queen of muu-muus! She is reason behind one of my favorite RuPaul runway quips. “Very Bed, Bath, and Beyoncé!” Here’s her awful song.
Brandon talks about how his teammates are going to talk about him in drag or something. His insecurity about that is not interesting but it does give us a chance to hear wise words from Courtney and Joslyn on the issue. Worrying about gay dudes in the locker room is like waiting for Bigfoot to walk out of your closet. While people may sneak a glance, you are not so attractive that we’re going to push you into a locker.
Everyone is serving “Hog Body” shade at Adore and her daughter. Because it’s funny.
But then! Bianca swoops in the snatch the best confessional line award which I just invented.
“After the makeover, Joslyn’s drag daughter looks like that one girl gremlin in Gremlins 2!”
Seriously. Cackling.
It’s time to Sissy That Walk! Ru continues to make everyone look like the amateurs they are in a blue sequined checkered gown. Neil Patrick Harris is here to be great and his husband is here. Umm, hi David? Is it just me or is it weird to see Michelle and Santino sitting next to each other? Michelle looks so good toned down. Love this trend boo!
Anyways! Let’s critique.
Joslyn actually looks pretty for my eyes. But DAT MAKEUP on Brandon. No. God. However, it’s overall a much better effort than her previous sewing challenge.
Courtney did a lovely job on the face but she seriously made her daughter look 60 years older. The gown looks a bit retro slip cover, but it’s not the worst. She really did make herself look young and perky and a nude dress with butterflies misses the mark on “mother of the bride” although she looks smashing.
Bianca looks great. Her clownish makeup helps to sell her look but the real star is the trim on the veil. So well done and a lovely way to call back to her own drag. She also sells it on the runway with her “tears.
Darienne actually kills it on the runway for her daughter. The goth look works really well and actually looks well put together. I also like the spraypaint bit. However, her own look is terrible! She looks almost exactly like she did in the first challenge except she didn’t add that trash-ass seam down the front of her skirt. And DAT WIG! NO NO NO.
Adore…
I don’t know what to say. This is honestly one of the worst runway showings I’ve ever seen. Like worse that Vivacious’ cartoon dinosaur realness. Worse that Rebecca Glasscock’s Ace Frehley realness. Worse than almost anything Tatianna wore. Worse than Shangela’s Christmas Coutorture. Worse than Stacy Layne’s red velvet jumpsuit. Worse than Jinkx reindeer candy cane thing.
Pause, can you think of any runway look worse than this?? The only one I can think of is Tatianna’s look for the Season 2 Ball Challenge. Serena Cha Cha’s “soft sculpture” lederhosen of yore.
This is so off the mark. Adore looks like the daughter and a terrible looking one. Her bride looks like something from your nightmares with a ragged wig, makeup that makes her face look bloated, and I don’t even know what’s happening with the gown. The leather jacket is literally the only nice thing about this look.
Dela definitely did a great job. I love the look and her face is great. I love her pink look and the cardigan/flower combination is super smart and nails that challenge theme.
The vow ceremony is sweet but blah. The goth couple was great though. Brandon still sounds like he hasn’t passed 2nd grade English. Dela’s dress is even better in the close-up. That’s enough of this. Time to read these ugly wimmens.
Brandon’s face is trash. She looks undead. But Joslyn definitely looks the best she has in weeks. Michelle is right on with the metallic face. The wedding dress isn’t strong though and the bodice is actually the exact same as her party look. Brandon is “struggling with his manlihood.”
The judges laugh at him and then he serves us yesterday’s craft services.
Rein Act looks like Tori Spelling. The length is very Adore and David calls out what I mentioned earlier about Rein Act looking like Courtney’s mother. Courtney tries to sell a cougar narrative, but she simply looks too good in comparison to her daughter. This was an opportunity for her to really step out of her box.
Bianca nails the family resemblance and I love the yellow trim. Bianca continues to quip her way to the top.
Darienne’s makeup skills continue to be off the charts. Her groom has a lot of personality and that’s super helpful in challenges like this. Darienne’s look is bad. Neil calls it out for being not goth. That wig is so horrendous.
Dela seriously killed it. Santino actually gives a valid tip in that the sharp-winged eye that Dela does would have added more resemblance. The gown though is fabulous and she really embraced the challenge.
Adore…Adore…Adore. Santino calls out the execution. There are no compliments as there shouldn’t be. It’s just terrible. The wig looks even worse in the close up.
The judges reiterate what they’ve said already. I’ll use this moment to talk about how dour and humorless Neil and David are. Like even worse that Chaz Bono. You would think they would be funny and upbeat, but it is such a downer to hear them talk. Blah.
RuPaul: “Oh you’re such a whore. We should, totally, go somewhere together…”
Back from commercials, Dela is safe while QUEEN BIANCA SNATCHES ANOTHER WIN!!!! GET INTO HER BEAT AND HER BANG!!!!
Adore is in the bottom for what has to be the single worst makeover ever. Courtney and Darienne are safe, leaving the Foxy Joslyn in the bottom two.
Joslyn and Adore lip sync to “Think” by Aretha Franklin. If only Latrice Royale was here!
Adore is super high energy but there’s this manic intensity that just doesn’t fit the song. I actually hate this performance although her face play is still good. Joslyn is good (not great), but having to lip sync is so much fabric seems foreign to her as she holds up the front of her gown for the entirety of the performance. It’s awkward and holds her back, but her performance works better for me.
But alas, it is Adore who is saved and we have to say goodbye to my lovemuffin Joslyn. 😦 😦 :(. Her exit speech is so mature and gracious. I just love her.
Now do I think it was Joslyn’s time? Yes. She is a great queen, but she needs a few more years to up her style game but she is a charismatic performer with tons of potential. I fully expect her to make a run on All-Stars 2 with increased funds and better style because she’s way stronger than I think anyone realized.
This is also the point where Adore is either going to have to rise to the occasion or get out. The rest of the season (barring the finale) is look-based challenges. If she doesn’t figure out how to present herself, she really should not be in the top 3, despite having fantastic charisma and performance skills. My gut tells me that Ru is going to keep her until the finale because of that star power, but her road is going to be much more difficult now.
I’d peg Bianca and Dela as finalists as of now, with Courtney and Adore battling for the third spot. Darienne has performed admirably. If you can ignore her bitchiness, she’s done a great job on the show. But she’s out of her depths at this point. Bianca and Ben are funnier with better style. Adore has way more natural charisma. Courtney has so much star power but she needs to push herself if she’s going to knock out Adore. What she has in style and confidence, she lacks in natural spark.
Untucked
Every one is super sweet and supportive. Blah blah blah…
Let me talk about how Darienne’s daughter is READING.
::props head on chin:: “That doesn’t mean it’s fashionable!”
Girl, I fell out.
On Adore talking about how she can’t sew: “You gotta get your skills up!”
::Laganja voice:: COME ON, GOTH BRIDE!
We “complete” Brandon’s story line as he accepts the gays in the locker room or whatever.
In the Gold Bar, we get a message from Adore’s mom and is it’s all super sweet. Love her! Bianca continues to be just the best at everything. I want to be her best friend.
And that’s about it. What are your thoughts, dear readers? Do you agree with the elimination? Who is your winner (Bianca is the only answer). Have a great day!
Class And Trash Show 