Ma’am, what is this??
Now for the most difficult question ever.
Buff Correll or This 20Fingers Lady?
So Class took the time to listen to that awful mess from Anthony and raised me a Jacquees.
So I’m listening and I’m like…his voice isn’t as bad as Anthony’s.
::the verse starts::
NO! NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!
Candy Rain with a Rihanna reference…
Who is encouraging these people? Why are there multiple terrible, hideous, off-key, raggedy, renditions of this classic????
We’re not going to be great until this is stopped.
Look for the Class & Trash cover of Candy Rain on iTunes!!! But again, here is the far superior original to cleanse your palette.
Have y’all heard this??
What you’re not going to do is take a classic R&B jam from the 90’s by a talented group of unattractive mens and turn it into…this.
Like you just took the beat from I’m Different even though it’s less than two years old.
Like you added this horrendous rap. Like the rapper version of Gia Gunn.
Like you added those HORRENDOUS vocals. Those thin nasally notes.
But really, this song makes me irrationally angry. It’s trading on the nostalgic value of two far superior songs with two barely mediocre talents. The fact that it is getting any airplay really bothers me. Anthony does not sound good. Anthony does not add anything to the song. He cribs the ad-libs and it sounds like it’s killing him to sing the song.
Billy Bang has less talent that J-Kwon and his rhymes are trash. TRAAAAAASH-UH.
Let’s end with the far superior original.
Do you hear the smooth harmonies? The pleasing production with the funky drum beat? Did you do the dance instinctively??
So although it’s Trashy Thursday, I thought today that I’d hold off on the jams and talk about something that’s been bothering me for a bit.
Normally, you’d see a Chris Brown picture here but you know I don’t really want to go through the efforts of uploading any pictures of him. Understand? I know you do.
Recently, Chris Brown’s jail stay was extended based on a violation of his parole. All while his song Loyal has cracked the top 10 on Billboard’s charts and his collaboration with Kid Ink is also in the top 40 as well. Despite the album push backs, none of this has affected his sales and record success. But to be honest, his success post the incident has always felt a little wrong. I’m going to try and work out why it bothers me so much.
So let’s flashback to 2009. Now, I will go on record saying that I remember asking what the hell happened to cause the whole situation. I remember saying that Chris Brown is terrible and thinking that Rihanna had to have done something for the violence to go that far. I regret that I may have blamed her or insinuated that she deserved it.
However, my issue with Lispy is not that actual attack even though it was terrible. It really boils down to the three issues.
1) He Keeps Fucking Up
Now far be it from me to try and psychoanalyze someone far richer and far more famous than me. But let’s keep it real. Chris Brown keep getting himself into situations where the police seem to show up. The DC situation, the window at Good Morning America, the valet situation, and the fight with Drake with the bottles… you know just to name a few. It might be different if there was only one or two instances, but I didn’t even give you a comprehensive list.
When you’re attempting to change your image and prove that you’re not a bad guy, you would think that you would ALWAYS let your bodyguard handle things. If you feel yourself getting angry, remove yourself from the situation. It’s not that he doesn’t have a right to get angry, but part of being a celebrity is working on your image. His continued fuckery seriously hampers my ability to give him another shot.
Take an example. I’m a celebrity with about 3 DUIs. Do I
a) Drive myself everywhere knowing I’m hitting the club? or
b) Hire a personal driver?
I would think the answer is clear.
2) These Songs…
One of the biggest defenses that I’ve seen mounted is that we should ignore his personal life and just focus on the music. So let’s just talk about a few Lispy songs.
(Spotify pays artists the least, so there’s that.)
Loyal has a catchy beat and in the cluh, you probably can catch me doing a cute two-step to it. But the thing about this song is that it’s a song for men who hate women and want to impress their friends. He’s insulting the very women who he’s taking home for not being loyal to their regular menfolk because a star is hitting on them.
Like I’m spending my money and time on this lady in the club because I’m interested in her, but she’s not loyal so watch out!
And the thing about it is that now you basic ass, trifling ass dudes think that this somehow applies to your life. That’s what is dangerous about these songs. There are people who don’t see this song for what it is, think that they can mistreat women because they aren’t “loyal.” It perpetuates the inherit distrust and hatred of women that allows people to treat them like objects instead of human beings.
Girl, fuck you. Like fuck you for this song.
Now generally, I think I that offenses committed prior to meeting a person should be out of scope in relationship decisions barring things that break the law or are genuinely gross. But this song is not an earnest plea in order to save a relationship. It’s not a genuine display of emotion.
This song is, simply put, a transparent grab at telling people to just forget about all of the things he’s done and continues to do. Don’t pay attention to my fuck-ass video proclaiming my love for both Rihanna and Karrueche. Nope, that parking lot scuffle with Frank Ocean does not exist!
Like I said in the first point, Lispy keeps fucking up. These aren’t isolated instances. These aren’t situations where he’s been pushed beyond a reasonable limit. So yes I’m going to judge you and I’m going to continue to hate this song.
Even beyond the message, the beat is plodding, his vocals are probably the weakest I’ve heard them, and the lyrics are treacly at best. Bye ashy.
3) He Has Real Issues
Now it’s come out that Chris has bipolar disorder and experienced sex at a super early age (8 years old). This is actually legitimately sad and underneath all of his bravado and antics, you can tell that there’s something brewing. No one just ups and gets kicked out of a rehab facility. These are not things that should be taken lightly. And I’m more than sure he’s on a hell of a lot of drugs.
However, he is not going to get the treatment he needs nor is he going to take these diagnoses seriously if there is no real punishment or time allowed to reflect on his past and where he wants to go. Celebrities tend to develop a sense of invincibility because of the constant adulation they receive, but those who crave being an alpha male tend to jump head first into maintaining that feeling. You combine this with the old school definition of being a “man” and you have someone who is blind to any criticism, regardless of how well meaning it may be.
By having continued success and greater acclaim during this time of turmoil, it appears that Chris’s ego has only grown and in a negative way. He’s finding chart success with songs that are good for young people’s psyches. He’s deflecting all punishment and critique instead of realizing where his actions have landed him.
While I can’t attribute all of his problems to his fame and success, I do think that they are playing a huge role in him growing up and making better choices. So to me, his success only exacerbates the problems that he faces.
I just miss fresh face Chris who did Doublemint commercials and sang Yo! I mean everyone has to grow up and we all face things that shape us as adults, but there’s a darkness to him that I always see even when he’s Harlem shaking and booty quaking in his videos. I’ve joked that he looks like he would eat your baby these days. But seriously, do a Google search. Homey looks cracked out. He has to get the help he needs if he’s going to prosper and be great.
I don’t know, maybe I’m reading too deep into it. What do you all think? Are you on Team Breezy and think the media is out to get him? Or is he an egomaniac with mediocre songs that can’t get his shit together? Let me know in the comments and we’ll chat about it.
Let’s end the post with one of my favorite Lispy jams.
You remember Soulja Boy? Yes you do!
I absolutely can not!!!!! It’s so terrible. And perfect. Like this is one of the top 10 worst songs I’ve ever heard. I adore it.
What are your thoughts??
We here at Class and Trash love terrible music, especially the songs of the Real Housewives. So we got together with our friend over at Overactive Blogger to rank our top 3 favorite housewife singles. There are bound to be some repeats (Trash purposely left off Chic, C’est La Vie) because you can’t dispute quality. Let’s get started!
1) Chic, C’est La Vie – Countess Luann (RHONY)
2) On Display – Melissa Gorga (RHONJ)
3) Tardy For the Party – Kim Zolciak (RHOA)
1) Tardy For the Party – Kim Zolciak (RHOA)
2) Money Can’t Buy You Class – Countess Luann (RHONY)
3) Who Gone Check Me Boo? – Sheree Whitfield (RHOA)
1) Money Can’t Buy You Class – Countess Luann (RHONY)
2) Gone With The Wind Fabulous – Kenya Moore (RHOA)
3) Bump It – Michelle Salahi (RHODC)