life goals

This Is My Confession…

Alright guys.  I have to tell you a secret.  I’m really depending on you to keep this secret.




I hate going to the gym.


I know! I know!  I’ve heard all of the reasons.

You feel so much better when you finish!

I don’t.

Don’t you want to be healthy!


You’ll live so much longer.

I don’t care. After age 75, I’m going to be on my couch eating Doritos and switching between drinking Simply Apple and Coconut Rum. 

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

Have you had German Chocolate Cake?

Now, this post isn’t to bash anyone who loves fitness and gets their high from a good workout.  I’m just not one of those people.  I couldn’t give two hot holy damns about the gym.  I hate to run and I hate lifting weights.  I would die trying to do yoga and I almost bashed my face into a wall messing around with Shaun T.

I do it because I’m going to be sickening in a few months and then you hoes aren’t going to be able to take me.  And once I’m skinny and rich, I’m going to get the fat sucked out because I’m sick of sweating.

Where are other inner fat kids who don’t have time for the elliptical?  And if you like working out, ummm maybe Class will do a post on that.  I got nothing.

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