gia gunn

You Could Have Kept This, Anthony Lewis

Happy Monday!

Have y’all heard this??

noperaja

 

What you’re not going to do is take a classic R&B jam from the 90’s by a talented group of unattractive mens and turn it into…this.

Like you just took the beat from I’m Different even though it’s less than two years old.

Like you added this horrendous rap.  Like the rapper version of Gia Gunn.

boomboom

Like you added those HORRENDOUS vocals.  Those thin nasally notes.

helltotheno

But really, this song makes me irrationally angry.  It’s trading on the nostalgic value of two far superior songs with two barely mediocre talents.  The fact that it is getting any airplay really bothers me.  Anthony does not sound good.  Anthony does not add anything to the song.  He cribs the ad-libs and it sounds like it’s killing him to sing the song.

Billy Bang has less talent that J-Kwon and his rhymes are trash.  TRAAAAAASH-UH.

Ugh…BYE ASHY!

Let’s end with the far superior original.

Do you hear the smooth harmonies?  The pleasing production with the funky drum beat?  Did you do the dance instinctively??

Right.

 

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RuPaul’s Drag Race S6, Ep5 Recap

Greetings loved ones!

How is your week going?  Team Trash is here to talk about Drag Race!  Obviously!

We open the episode with Darienne serving up some shade to Milk over her last runway.  While I wasn’t the biggest fan of the Lamaze realness, Darienne would be better served tailoring her gowns rather than concerning herself with the competition.

Laganja discusses the last Untucked where she received a message from her parents.  Now I love Laganja because she’s super obnoxious but has some measure of talent.  But girl, no matter what?  This is a competition.  You all get along and share a bond.  But no one is obligated to give your the floor just because your family sent a supportive message to you.  Bianca obviously made a joke to lighten the mood and you are too busy being offended to see that she was happy for you.  Bye girl, fly girl.

The next day, Laganja has arrived with a Badu headpiece.  I’m not going to lie, I’m living for it a little.  But it’s clearly a grab for attention.  Bianca calls her on it and proceeds to read the fuck out it.  At this point, Bianca is approaching Jade from ANTM levels of love for me.

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(Source: Fourfour.com)

We get no mini-challenge this week as RuPaul announces The Snatch Game!  This episode is always a treat.  It tests the queens’ ability to be funny,impersonate a celebrity, and banter in real time.  No amount of fishiness is going to win this.  I mean this is the challenge that made Jinkx Monsoon and Tatianna into competitors.  Where we got to Chad Michaels be completely fabulous.  Sharon’s Michelle Visage?  Willam’s Jessica Simpson?  This is the challenge that can get you to the finals if you play your cards right.

So who is everyone portraying?

Adore Delano – Anna Nicole Smith

Ben DeLaCreme – Maggie Smith

Bianca Del Rio – Judge Judy

Courtney Act – Fran Drescher

Darienne Lake – Paula Deen

Gia Gunn – Kim Kardashian

Joslyn Fox – Teresa Guidice

Laganja Estranga – Rachel Zoe

Milk – Julia Child

Trinity K. Bonet – Nicki Minaj

Ru shakes Dela’s and Milk’s confidence doubting their ability to bring the funny with their characters.

Adore impresses with a note-for-note rendition of Anna’s MTV VMA speech.  Let’s relive that because it truly is amazing.

God, I love her.  And knowing that Adore does too makes me like her way more. Laganja actually seems with it in her interactions with Ru. RuPaul tells us that she watches Judge Judy every single day, putting a crap-ton of pressure on Bianca.  I’m not worried for her.

Gia shows that she knows nothing about the Snatch Game when she initially picks Selena.  This is different than Milk and Ben who at least understand being over the top.  The thing about the Snatch Game is that the look actually means very little.  If you look like the celebrity, it’s a great help but Alaska and Sharon pulled it out without looking exactly alike because they brought humor and performance to the challenge.  Adore is totally correct in her assessment that there is nothing you can do with Selena.  Selena is many things; beautiful, talented, and taken way before her time.  But funny, she is not.

Gia does course correct changing to Kim Kardashian who is at least ripe for parody.  We jump right into the game.  Listen, kudos to the editors for making it the focus of the episode.  I like that a lot.

Gillian Jacobs (from Community) and Heather Macdonald (from Chelsea Lately) are our celebrity guest judges.

During the game, Judge Judy is already amazing.  Bianca obviously prepared for this but seriously, she is bringing it.  Anna Nicole is KILLING me! Adore is really rising in my estimation because this is a genuinely strong performance. Julia is a little bland and  Milk is not prepared at all. You can see that Ru is not feeling it.  Fran Drescher is great but the humor isn’t as strong. Rachel is…okay. Darienne as Paula is inspired but simply is overshadowed.  She was good though. Gia Gunn is way too dumb for this.  She’s simply not clever enough to even compete.  Joslyn Fox is incredible.  I already declared my love for her but she is wearing me out. Ben Delacreme as Maggie Smith is divine.  Every detail was thought out.  Every answer and response made total sense given the character.  Brilliant. Seriously, Trinity K. Bonet should do a Nicki Minaj tribute show.  She looks just like her in profile.  As for the humor…

floptyra
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Source: Fourfour.com)

Trash’s Favorite Snatch Game Lines:

We went back to the old country and figure out how to pronounce it.  Johnson.  -Joslyn

Like my body?!? – Adore

Let’s just keep it at Mr. Charles and Dame Smith! -Dela

BOLOGNA! – Bianca

Well I could you a fried bologna sandwich myself! – Darienne

“I put hair.  And I think I won…” -Adore

“Am I too understand that one rips the telephone right out of the wall and takes it with them? – Dela

“EXCUSE ME, WE ORIGINATED THE LANGUAGE!” – Dela

“Beauty fades.  DUMB IS FOREVER!” -Bianca

‘Prostitution Whorses” – Joslyn

“Vod–cuh” -Adore

“Cumin! Cumin.” -Joslyn

“I did think it would be rather amusing if libations were flavored with citrus!” -Ben

Trash’s Favorite Confessional Reads

“That’s unfortunate…”  –Trinity on Laganja’s Rachel Zoe voice

“Milk ain’t no Meryl Streep!”– Bianca on Milk

Pause.  Joslyn Fox’s Fran Drescher is AMAZING.  Like her Mr. Sheffield is so on point.  She could win with that performance.

So if you can’t tell by the favorite lines section, this really came down to Dela, Bianca, Joslyn, and Adore. Honestly, I thought this was the absolute best Snatch Game in terms of top performances.  I laughed out loud several times.

We learn more about Ben’s history being overweight and her mother’s death.  It is completely moving and I think that she makes sense on how she uses it to be stronger today.  Bianca volunteers to lend Adore a cincher to keep her out of Michelle’s claws.  Aww nice Bianca.  Since Adore was so great in the Snatch Game, I’m totally feeling their bond.

On to the Runway.  Michelle dressed as RuPaul is always fun.  I also love RuPaul’s technicolor gown.  Let’s talk about the runway which asked the girls to be inspired by RuPaul’s Night of 1000 Gowns.

Joslyn Fox – Looks spectacular.  This is her best look so far.

Gia Gunn – DAT. WIG. THOSE BOOBS. NO GAWD.  This is almost as bad as that creature thing she wore in episode 2.

Darienne Lake – Love the mask.  She really needs to either have more train or cut a split in her gowns.  This looks is so close to amazing but the awkward fall of her gowns isn’t working for me.

Laganja Estranja – I love the catsuit, but her wig is not the answer.

Bianca Del Rio – Look at the makeup!  Her face is beat for Zeus, but the gown isn’t the best.

Adore Delano – Really needs to get better gowns and wigs.

Trinity – The gown isn’t great but she managed to channel Ru.

Ben DelaCreme – LISTEN HERE YOU BITCH!!!! YOU ARE EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW.

Courtney Act – Such a good idea channeling Supermodel of the World Ru.  Love the wings and the twirl.

Milk –

Shockandawe

Okay.  I actually like the idea.  And unlike last week, Milk did truly put some thought into this one.  That said, her instincts were SO SO WRONG!!!! Like completely off.  Ru specifically said Night of 1000 Gowns.  Did she not see how unimpressed Ru was with Alaska last season?  No ma’am!

Courtney, Darienne, Joslyn, and Trinity are the safe queens this episode.

At the judging, the top queens are Bianca, Ben, and Adore.

Bianca’s Judge Judy is praised and she was fabulous.  Adore is read for her look, but she nailed the performance.  Ben DeLaCreme was incredible and looks incredible.  Gillian mentions that she’s been saying her line about the language all day, which is high praise.

The bottom queens are Gia, Laganja, and Milk.

Gia’s eye makeup is fucked up.  Let’s let Courtney demonstrate.

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Source: Twitter)

And Michelle and Ru are completely correct in their assessment that Gia was not funny and not prepared for this challenge.  Laganja is told that her mannerisms were off and that she didn’t work in enough catch phrases.  She admits that seeing how good the other girls were threw her off.  This is honestly why I like her.  She may be all over the place and obnoxious, but she has the self awareness to realize that she wasn’t strong here.  Michelle is totally correct in her assessment that I love the idea of Boy Ru and the execution.  But like i said before, this is the wrong time to debut this look.  Santino straight up says that a shocking look for Milk would be traditionally pretty.

Let’s digress for a bit.  In the past few seasons, two queens (Sharon Needles and Jinkx Monsoon) have won the show while not using a lot of glamour in their looks.  But because this is a show, they both were able to demonstrate to the panel that they were capable of it.  This gave the judges comfort in their ability to straight up “turn it the fuck out.”  Milk has to show that if she wants to really compete.

Ru advises Milk to show more vulnerability similar to her discussion about being afraid of being less than in glamour versus glamour-off with the rest of the girls .

Once the girls are off stage, Ru comments that this is the tightest Snatch Game in history.  It’s nice to see the runway factor into the discussion.  They haven’t lost their focus on the challenge.  Michelle continues to hate on Ben DelaCreme and she is completely wrong.  Ben playing an old lady is not the same as being in a rut.

ByeAshy
(Source: Luvvie)

Gillian is totally correct in saying that Kim K. should have tried to start each sentence with a K.

The girls come back and Ben Delacreme wins!!!  WERQ!!!!

yas

Dela’s runway look really put her over the top for me.  She’s the first queen to two wins this season!

Milk is sent to safety as Gia and Laganja fall into the bottom two.  The two queen lip sync to Head to Toe by Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam.  Love this song!!!!

Gia is doing her best in her gown and unflattering padding but Laganja’s dance ability and legs take it for her and save her from elimination.  Gia is sent home but seriously her wig is so offensive.

But to be honest, this is a shocker for me.  I would have never expected Ru to get rid of Gia so early.  She is a bitchy, dumb queen with a hint of talent.  But she’s not as focused or skilled a la Roxxxy Andrews to overcome her weaknesses.

This set of queens really is fantastic.  There are weaknesses and no one queen has it all, but from top to bottom, this is the strongest set of queens to date.

How did you like the episode?  Let us know in the comments below or over on the Twitter at @ClassNTrashShow.

RuPaul’s Drag Race S6, Ep4 Recap

Hellooooooo Dolly!

Okay, I’m sorry.  That was a cheap, easy joke.  And Team Trash should be better than that.  It’s just Trash this time.

sorryboutit

We get a throwaway mini challenge this week. Female or Shemale.  The queens saw extreme close-ups of either drag queens or biological womens and had to guess which was which.   Ben DeLaCreme (yay!) and Adore (ugh…) win and become team captains for the main challenge.

Shade the RuSical!  I can already tell you that Class is jealous that he was not one the show for this episode.

But I’m getting ahead of myself.  The show immediately starts out with the “Battle of the Idols”  between Courtney Act and Adore Delano.  We knew that when they hit the singing challenge, this would come up.  Personally, I think that Adore has the stronger voice, but Courtney has more control and is more effortless.

Also, let’s just talk about this.  Because it makes me happy.

As the queens rehearse, we hear Gia’s singing voice.

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Ru visits and as the queens prepare, Joslyn gets in a quick read citing Bianca Del Rio and inspiration for her butch queen look. She really has more going for her than I thought.

Trinity is showing her ass because she’s nervous. To quote Alyssa Edwards, “Get a grip, get a life, and get over it.”  This is season 6.  Show up and compete, ho!

Listen.  Joslyn Fox is everything this episode.  I really do feel bad for April.  You can tell that she is putting in 100% effort and she simply isn’t a musical queen.

“Is she frustrated sexually?” Shut up Gia.

Ooh Trinity. You are out of line. And defensive. Get it together. I get that Bianca has a slick mouth but you should be able to take it.

Laganja is so obnoxious and I love her.

What’s a Tony? Good bye Gia.

Adore talks about “butching” it up for Idol. Which sucks that she wasn’t able to really be herself as she competed.

Gia discusses her history of kabuki which is actually interesting. If she spent more time talking about her past instead of being dumb and catty, I might like her.

We have not given Ru props for looking amazing on the runway each week. She looks phenomenal.

SHERYL LEE RALPH!!!! ::yas gif::

And cute Lucian. Hey boo.

The Dragbill was a nice touch, Ru.

Shade: The Rusical

Darienne’s dancing is not good and weakens her and Gia’s performance.

Ben is FABULOUS!  She totally brought it as the Shady Lady.  Could have won.

COURTNEY is everything.  She’s a fucking star.

Bianca is actually great and is really shining.

Trinity and Gia…do better than expected. Neither is going to win but both really give it their all.

Adore’s look is just a mess. But her singing is good-ish. She has sounded better.

Laganja and Joslyn are great. Joslyn seriously is amazing here. LUV HUH.

Milk should be better than this. Like she’s not the worst, but her look is disappointing.

Poor April is trying her absolute best. It’s not a good performance though.

Runway Rundown

Bianca continues to look smashing.  But she still needs to show a new silhouette.

Trinity looks okay but some of her looks still reads a little inexpensive.

Darienne – Ooh girl, this is bad. It doesn’t flow like a gown should.

Gia looks much better than last week. But I’m not a huge nude fan in general though.

Ben is drag fabulousness. Loving Ben and she better make the top six.

Courthey Act is fabulous.  Like there’s no critique when you look like that.

Laganja is love.  I honestly think she looks amazing most of the time.  Alyssa taught her well.

April’s gown is pretty, but this is not her best.  Last week’s rainy day was her high point.

Joslyn looks good, too. Gia was correct in that her wig was not hot.

Milk disappointed me this week.  Her look this week was weird but it’s not interesting or clever this time like the past 2 weeks

Adore looks okay. This was better than last week but her looks just aren’t very good.

Judging

During the judging panel, Sheryl READS the dog shit out of Trinity. Darienne is clueless, failing to realize that she was not great in the Rusical.  Michelle is completely wrong for coming for Ben. She killed it. And Courtney brought it…but came across a little arrogant during the judging.  But she knows that she rocked it.  Can’t blame her there.

Adore didn’t cinch again. And her dress is worse upon closer inspection. Ooh, the reads for April. Poor girl, she really is trying her hardest.  The judges hate Trinity’s diction but Ru defends her flipper. They do hate her attitude. Sheryl is life acquired.  Permanent guest judge!

Courtney and Ben really are the shining stars. Michelle is OFF here.  Santino is defending Adore and I guess she really shouldn’t go this week. Poor April. All of the effort is noted though.

I love the reveal of the winners. Courtney wins!!!! Obviously though. She really nailed it. Adore and Ben are top.

Darienne is saved from the bottom two, leaving Trinity and April to lip sync to I’m Every Woman by Chaka Khan.  These girls better bring it.

And they both do!  Trinity is WERQING her fan! April is really good though but like Dida Ritz before her, sometimes a black girl just can’t be beat.  Trinity chantays and April Carrion is told to sashay away.

I am sad for April. She really is a gorgeous girl and she is by no means a bad queen. I hope the best for her.

What did you guys think?  Let us know on Twitter at @ClassNTrashShow or in the comments below.

Pause: I don’t typically talk about Untucked but let’s talk about how dumb Gia is. Gia was being ignorant and being rude. Milk, for all of her issues, is not below anyone. And Gia is literally the worst. THE WORST. She isn’t actually that great a fishy queen and yet she acts like she’s sitting.

ByeAshy

Joslyn is so right in this argument. And I’m living for her.

RuPaul’s Drag Race S6, Ep3 Recap

The time has come! For Class and Trash to recap another episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race!

This episode was a hoot.  It started with the two groups meeting each other with shade flying fast and furious.

Bianca’s instant dislike for Gia only makes Trash love her more.  And Gia saying “I don’t like messy queens.  I don’t like cheap queens.  And I don’t like manly queens.”

rupauljudgingyou

I can’t stand her.

For the mini challenge, the queens were told to pair up with a queen from the other group and do a bikini lip sync to Click Clack using the top half of one queen and legs of the other.  I’m not going to lie, I found all of this super amusing.

Trash also thought April’s “Ariel” look was brilliant.  She’s really rising in my estimation.

Trash would have gone with Courtney and Laganja but RuPaul was feeling Adore and Milk’s dance.  Milk’s decision not to tuck might have played a role.  I know you were looking!

lilnasty

Next, Ru announced that the queens would split into two teams to film horror movies, one from the 60’s and one from the 80’s.  The queens split back into the groups from Episodes 1 & 2, which is a huge mistake on the part of Adore.  The difference in talent between the two groups really is astounding.  Also, how dumb is Gia?  

Please leave.

Team Milk takes on the 60’s script and all of the queens seem to do incredibly well, with the exception of Miss Trinity K. Bonet.  I hate that I softened my stance on her because she was just a mess this week.  I get that she’s not an actress, but no.  And seriously, she wants to be a Beyoncé impersonator?????

noperaja

Bianca was absolutely correct in that you can perform as an artist, but to build an entire stage show around it, you have to have the resemblance.  Chad Michaels looks like Cher in makeup.  That’s why she’s so successful and that’s the appeal of that type of show.  With all the Beyoncé worship, lack of charisma, and cancelled barbecue, Trinity really is Tyra Sanchez.  We know it’s you, you can’t win again!

Bianca killed it. Courtney brought it. Darienne was fabulous. Milk was good as well.

Joslyn blew me away actually.  Trash was expecting some Tatianna realness from her, and she really was shockingly good in the skit. Granted, it was a ditzy queen playing a ditzy character, but I want to see more from her now.

Team Adore was tragic.  The group went on stage with no full run-through.  Tragic.  Poor April was cast as the butch character which was not a good idea.  Vivacious should have played this part.  Laganja was not bad.  Gia were middling at best and her beige lip gloss looked dumb.  Adore didn’t know her lines.  Vivacious’ “Lie-za Minnelli LIES!” was great.  A shame about her awful performance in the box though.

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The shining star here was Ben DelaCreme who really shines when compared to these scrubs.  She’s got the goods to go the distance.

Another Gia is the worst moment.  “I found it funny that theirs was in black and white and ours was in color.”

emmaoverit

Let’s talk about the runway (the theme was your best drag).  The guest judges were Lena Headey and Linda Blair who were both super into it and gave great comments.

Bianca gave us exaggerated collar and is clearly working on toning down her clownish makeup.  Trash think she is going to have to show some versatility in her silhouette.

Courtney’s Australian flag gown is fabulous.  WERQ!  She’s flawless.

Joslyn looked so much like Tatianna on the runway.  Trash loved the dress but it was super bland.

Trinity’s tangerine gown is pretty, but a little cheap looking.  You could also see her bra.  Rookie mistake.

Milk wore another super interesting look with a Pinocchio-nose.  Trash didn’t love it, but you are not going to forget a queen like that.  And that was her intent.

Darienne’s wings were lovely and I think she really made it shine.  The dress itself was a little shapeless but it worked for her.  Her face is always super beat.

April Carrion’s rainy day realness???

werk

She really got all of my attention.  She looked incredible.

Laganja looked incredible as well.  The butterfly fascinator was stunning and her face was beat for the gods.

Gia looked ridiculous. She has too much mouth, no sense of humor, and that look was stupid.  It wasn’t interesting.  It wasn’t pretty. And her padding was raggedy.  She can go now.

Adore looked okay enough, but it was nothing special.  Trash liked her eye makeup.  That said, when RuPaul told her “Stars put in the work!” she was right on the money.

Ben DeLaCreme looked cute in her hot pink one piece.  I like that she pads super curvy.

Vivacious?

Green_Bumble_Ball

Yeah…no.

So Team Milk won in what had to be the most obvious win in the show’s history.  Darienne won the challenge for her work as the head.  I probably would have gone with Courtney, but I’m not mad at her at all.

Adore, April, and Vivacious received the harshest critiques and for the second week in a row, Adore is saved from the lip sync.  Now, Trash loves Ru, but this wasn’t the move. Adore’s natural obnoxiousness may have worked for the role, but neither her look or acting was impressive.  April’s runway should have saved her from the bottom two.

But April & Vivacious face of to “Shake It Up” by Selena Gomez.

RuPaul was getting her life though and both girls brought it.  April won the lip sync and Vivacious the dinosaur sashayed away.  This was definitely the right decision.

What did Class think? I’m much more simpler in my thoughts.

Vivacious girl. WE WERE ROOTING FOR YOU WE WERE ALL ROOTING FOR YOU AND HOW DARE YOU?!?! I hope she went home and burned that thing. You better SERVE at the finale. Did she think that was REALLY cute? She looked like Reptar from the Rugrats. No ma’am.

Bianca is my new favorite. She better come for Adore’s cheap ass wig. YAAAAASSSSS!  As a matter of fact…Adore take your happy ass home. I tried to like you but you think you’re are better than you ACTUALLY are. Girl BYE! And Courtney (while boring) still gets the Hey boo (wink…call me) of the week.

All in all, this was another fantastic episode and we laughed all through it.  Let us know your thoughts in your comments below or on Twitter!  Let’s discuss!