Queen of Music: Cassie

Hello and Happy Thursday!  Can you believe it’s almost March?

Now typically, today would be Trashy Thursday and I’d share the hottest of messes that I could find.  But I’m definitely having my man-strual cycle, so I plan to eat snacks and nap all day.  But that doesn’t mean I can’t start a new feature that I like to call “Queen of Music”.

So what makes someone a Queen of Music?  I like to break it down like this:

1 part mediocre vocal talent
2 parts good looks
1/2 part sleeping with producers
4 parts hilarious antics
1/2 part listenable music

So now it’s time to crown our first ever Queen of Music.  Cassandra Ventura, COME ON DOWN!

ocomeondown

Now Cassie is a phenomenally gorgeous woman. Tall, thin, with incredible bone structure and a striking face.  She was meant to be a star.  But then there’s the whole singing thing.  

eek

Cassie just does not have a great voice.  But you know during the first decade of the 2000’s, vocal talent was not necessary to having a hit song. So Cassie and her Myspace page took the internet by storm with her single, ‘Me and U’.

Now I hear you saying, that this isn’t the version you’re used to.  But with a budget of tens of dollars and a flip cam, Cassie made this amazing video.  It is my personal mission to make sure everyone on Earth sees the black-light sequence.  Remember this was a time where Paris Hilton wasn’t a joke.  Well as big a joke.

The moment at 2:50 makes me cackle every single time I see it.  And her dance moves?  ***Flawless.

But anyways, the success of this song and the fact that Cassie looks like a freaking supermodel got the attention of Puff Daddy/P. Diddy/Diddy and he signed her to a record deal. Success was in her reach with the official release of Me & U.

What’s really noticeable is that there were not a lot of changes to this version from her original version.  Diddy was right as the song shot up the charts and became a worldwide success!  Don’t lie, you jammed to it! 

wiigroll

Fun Fact: Trash can actually reenact this entire video.  Don’t be jealous of my boogie!

Cassie was living the good life and she was primed to challenge Rihanna and Amerie for their thrones.  But then tragedy.

The Downfall

Umm…well.  Ooh Cassie what happened here?

Giiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirl….no.

Cassie! The girl who doesn’t speak English sounds better, well she is actually trying.  Props to the sign in the audience (Elfy, une vraie artiste).

See the thing about Cassie is that she really can’t sing or dance.  She also doesn’t have a metric ton of charisma to back it up.  Me and U is a great song because of the production (Ryan Leslie is fantastic at his job), not because of her raw talent.  When forced to perform the song live, her career became derailed and it seemed the world became more interested in laughing at her than singing along with her.  

But that didn’t stop Cassie from trying!

“Try to take me out to dinner, I CANCEL IT!”

They attempted to step up the dancing in this video and cut all the live performances from her schedule.  But the song never gained a lot of traction and Bad Boy was now scrambling to figure out to do with Cassie.

Diddy attempted to have her sub for Nicole Scheherazade in a live performance of Come To Me.

She was paired with L’il Wayne during the peak of his career.

And none of that really worked.  The thing is that the general public is willing to ignore mediocre singing talent if you bring it with catchy songs (Rihanna), fierce dance moves (Jennifer Lopez), and water cooler discussion (Ke$ha).  But Cassie really doesn’t have any of those things.

Now this post is coming across like I’m bashing our Queen of Music, but really I find everything about Cassie super entertaining.  It’s the combo of being extremely beautiful but seemingly clueless about where her talents lie.  Had she accepted that she should be modeling and not singing, this post would be a lot different.  Most of her songs are slickly produced and fun to listen to, but the addition of her singing has no effect in making the song better.  I’ll provide two examples below.

King Of Hearts

I LOVE THIS SONG! It’s the perfect workout song.  The production is spot-on!  There’s a lot going that gradually builds as the song builds to the breakdown and final chorus.  The pounding bass line, the echoed voices, the synth line, and the gradual build-in of chords around her voice all work.  Even the use of having Cassie’s “harmonies” being an octave apart was smart.  

But notice, that all of my praise goes to Cassie’s production team and not her singing.  The only “interesting” thing she adds is the random octave jump on the “King of Hearts” in the last chorus.  She looks incredible in the video though.

The Boys

Now I’m no fan of Nicki Minaj, but can you point out what Cassie adds to this song besides the off-key “You Get Hiiiiigh” and looking supremely gorgeous in all of her outfits?  I’ll wait.

cookie

 

But with that said, my world would be incomplete without the musical stylings of Cassie.  She is a delight, seems like a really sweet girl, and she’s managed to keep her record deal despite a relative lack of success.  You go girl!  

Now I’m going to go dance to King of Hearts.  Leave your favorite Cassie memories below and make your nomination for the next QUEEN! OF! MUSIC!

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